The Ultimate Decision Making Tool

When Making a Decision is Making You Sick


“I have 2 Job opportunities. One is on the East Coast and one is on the West Coast. I don’t know how to decide which one to take.”

The above question was asked by a lady from New York during my radio show yesterday. We all struggle with questions in life where our decision making abilities are put to the test. We are asked to decide between the blue pill or the red pill? These kinds of dilemmas are great ways to hone our decision making skills, but they are also great reasons to keep us up at night. Think back to the last time you had a difficult choice to make. Chances are good one of those choices would mean a great degree of change for you, and the other not so much. Perhaps the choice is clear, but F.E.A.R. (False Evidence Appearing Real) keeps you from embracing the best choice.

Whenever you have an either/or life decision, try to relax…You can’t get the answer wrong because there are no wrong answers. There are just life situations or experiences which offer different kinds of growth. If Neo (Matrix) had chosen the blue pill, he would have had a different experience than the one he had. Either choice would have been the right choice for the experience his being was ready to have. When all is said and done, the same will be true for you.

In any either/or decision, there are actually 3 choices. You also have the choice not to choose and to stay where you are. If the thought of staying where you are makes you feel sick to your stomach or causes heartache, then you know the time is right for change in your life.

Being able to hear that still, small voice within can be difficult, so here is the ultimate decision making tool to use when you can’t decide between opportunities. I am sharing part of the answer I gave to the lady from New York (quoted above), but this decision making tool would work for any major life choice you are contemplating too.

  • Take 2 pieces of paper and write East Coast on the first page. Write West Coast on the second page.
  • Now set up 2 columns on each page. Put ‘Pros’ on one side of the column and ‘Cons’ on the other.
  • Begin to fill the columns on each page with all the reasons for and all the reasons against each opportunity. Take your time with this. The best decisions bubble up from the subconscious when we have cleared the crud standing between the ‘old, outdated you’ and the ‘new you’ that wants to grow and expand.
  • Assign a number between one and ten to each pro and con you list, depending on how important that reason is for you. example…If living on the east coast means you will be close to family and that is important, perhaps you will assign a 9 or 10 to that reason.
  • When you feel you have exhausted all the reasons for and against each opportunity, add the totals assigned to each point. Whichever opportunity scores higher is the winner. You now have a solid way to make a decision.

You can use the above tool to help you with decision making in any major life situation.

Major life change is scary. Trust that you do know what is right for you. Sometimes you just need a little help to connect with the answer.

Oh, and if you still need help you can use this suggestion from Big Bang Theory. Amy is helping Sheldon choose a game console. She tells him to flip a coin and then says “if you are disappointed with the result, you’ll know which decision you were meant to make” Sheldon flips the coin and when he sees the result, he throws the quarter and stomps off. I’d say he got his answer ;)

If you need answers, why not book a Chaos to Clarity session.

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