How to Make Sense of Your Sensitive Nature

Published On: 02/19/2024Categories: INFJ HSPTags: , , ,

How to Make Sense of Your Sensitive Nature

Published On: 02/19/2024Categories: INFJ HSPTags: , , ,

A sensitive in an insensitive world

As a sensitive in an insensitive world, you pick up on ‘energies’. Since You, Me and Everything is made up of energy, you can experience sensory overload. You’re so finely-tuned, you sense things others don’t seem to notice.

Are you sensitive to sound or smell? What about noise? Do certain foods cause problems? Some people are even sensitive to the emotional or physical pain of others. And this is only a partial list.

If this sounds like you, Welcome! You have a great gift. Trouble is, the owner’s manual for this gift is missing. You need somewhere to get your hand’s on the manual so you can develop your leading edge Super Power. The X-men had a school. This site is your SAFE place to learn, connect and grow.

Puzzle Pieces

This post is your ‘How-To’. It’s a simple way to understand how the puzzle pieces of your Super Power come together. With this ‘manual’, you’ll be able to use your heightened sensitivity and Thrive!

A Rose By Any Other Name : INFJ, Highly Sensitive Person, Empath

Have you noticed how language is both a blessing and a curse? Being able to ‘name’ something gives you a way to understand a concept and relate it to others. But once you ‘name’ something, you also put a box around it.

We all do this. We make sense of the world by way of labels. We determine what something is, by figuring out what it isn’t! We fall in love with our concept and in some cases will fight to the death for a label.

Here’s 3 examples of provocative labels heard in our world.

  1. One says God, the other Allah.
  2. One says God, the other Goddess.
  3. One says Angels, the other Spirits.

See what I mean? Same concept, different labels.

Yours truly is an Empath, an HSP and an INFJ. I’m also a woman, mother, lover, friend, writer, human. (I like that last one the best!) Labels give you a sense of who I am, but they don’t define me. None of us, you included, can be defined by a label.

The giants who’ve devoted their life to understanding human behaviour are many. Their labels give us a starting point as we understand the life journey of the Sensitive person.

INFJ – Rebel With a Cause

The INFJ personality makes up only 1% of the population. But there are more searches on the internet for INFJ than any of the other 15 personality types. INFJ’s also have a tendency to self-report as HSP and Empaths. (You’ll find more on HSP and Empaths coming up in this post.)

We’ll delve a little deeper in to the INFJ personality type since it fits well with the ‘Sensitive’ theme of this site.

Based on the answers to the above qualifiers, an INFJ needs time alone to recharge. They use their intuition when deciding what information is worth taking in. They make decisions based on compassion and the human cost of any choice. They make lists and structured plans. They tend to follow through on their plans.

INFJ’s are known as the Advocates because they will further the cause of something they believe in. They are

  • often creative, driven and soft-spoken
  • intuitive and sensitive
  • at risk of overloading their sensitive nervous systems
  • both dreamers and doers

Famous INFJ’s include

  • Mother Teresa
  • Martin Luther King
  • Nicole Kidman.

Want to know your MBTI? Get a free Personality profile. (After you finish this great article ) Then share your 4 letter code in the comments section.

HSP – The Highly Sensitive Person

HSP is a term coined by Elaine N Aron Ph.D. She has been studying HSP since 1991 and is an expert in the field.

According to Dr. Aron, Highly Sensitive Persons absorb more information than average. Their brains process differently and they are more aware of subtleties. Because of this, they can become overwhelmed by stimuli.

Stimuli which can impact their sensitive nervous systems and cause stress include:

  • Sounds
  • Crowds
  • Lighting
  • Sights
  • Emotions of others
  • Violence
  • Injustice

If this sounds like you, give yourself time alone to recharge. Take walks in nature, spend time with animals, engage in gentle art and soothing music. Activities such as these have been a lifesaver for yours truly. They work wonders for the nervous system of most, if not all HSP.

Dr. Aron estimates that 1 in 5 humans are Highly Sensitive Persons.

That’s too many to be considered a disorder, and too few to be seen as common.

This Brain and Behaviour Study can help you to better understand Sensory Processing Sensitivity and the HSP trait.

Introducing the Empath

What Weighs Me Down is Not Mine to Carry

In “Top Ten Traits of an Empath” Psychiatrist, Empath and Intuitive Healer Dr. Judith Orloff writes

“The trademark of an empath is that they feel and absorb other people’s emotions and/or physical symptoms because of their high sensitivities. They filter the world through their intuition and have a difficult time intellectualizing their feelings.”
Dr. Judith Orloff

To put this in perspective,

1. Sympathy is trying to understand the experience of another.

2. Empathy is the ability to find common ground with another. You’ve had a similar experience as another and can put yourself in their shoes. You are able to connect with what they are going through.

3. An Empath is different. They feel what another is feeling; even if they haven’t had the experience themselves. It can be confusing to have a thought, emotion or sensation which doesn’t come from you. This represents a ‘cross-over’ of boundaries.

For an empath, there’s a sense of being both the drop and the ocean. Humans need to know where one begins and the other ends to have the most successful life possible. This can be a challenge for an empath.

Intimate relationships can be especially difficult for empaths. That’s because it’s hard for them to know where one begins and the other ends. Empaths can be drawn to Narcissists and get hurt in relationship.

If you’re an Empath, you may take on the feelings, emotions and physical pain of others. You could be unaware you are doing so. It’s so important that Empaths learn to both enact boundaries and know the self intimately.

Empaths have a real gift as intuitive healers. If you’re an empath, life will “open up” when you recognize your gift and learn to use it.

The 3 Pillars of the Sensitive Person

Imagination, Intuition and Energy

“Imagination is more important than knowledge. For knowledge is limited, whereas imagination embraces the entire world, stimulating progress, giving birth to evolution.”
Albert Einstein

An understanding of energy can be helpful for the ‘sensitive’ person. Let your imagination and intuition run wild as you ponder the following.

Many ‘sensitives’ are born with the ability to ‘pierce the veil’. They have access to knowledge not available to the masses. The following is a personal theory of energy and how it flows in the Sensitive being. (Feel free to expand on it in the comments section.)

Everything is energy. The experience we have on Earth is one where energy is slowed down so much, it appears to be solid. All energy is measured in frequency. The human body can decipher information within a specific frequency range. There’s an audible range (hearing) and a visual range (sight).

A lot of information exists outside those ranges, but we’re not equipped to pick up most of it. This should be a sign to everyone that

“Just because you can’t perceive something, doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist”.

Humans have a third way of processing information. It’s the Chakras. Sensitive people have this ability to a greater extent than the other 80% of the population.

You as an Energy Magnet

Everything exists on a spectrum. That includes the ability to access and process information. Some ‘sensitives’ will be capable of picking up more, and some less. Every sensitive will be able to hone their ability. Like the pianist who practices scales, you too can become a virtuoso. Practice using your ‘sensitivity’ Super Power.


  • how to work with the chakras
  • how you personally filter energies through your own chakras

will help you hone your Super Power.

More about these ‘things’ called Chakras

A chakra is like a conduit with 2 wires inside.

  • One wire sends information from the crown to the ground.
  • The other sends information from the ground to the crown.

We can use the flow of electrons through a wire to illustrate how the chakras work.
Electrons line up like soldiers in a straight line and leap frog over one another to move energy through a wire. If one of the electrons (soldiers) steps out of line or hits a snag, everything slows down. When everything slows down, heat builds up.

This is exactly what’s happening in your computer circuit board when it slows down and then heats up. It’s nearly impossible to create a wire without impurities. (The same could be said about a human.) The impurities slow down the flow of electrons and heat is the result.

Our chakras have both wires and circuits in them. The circuits help to attenuate the flow of energy through the wires.

If the circuits become damaged, there’s a blockage in the flow of energy and heat builds up. This kind of heat usually shows up as a problem we have to solve for our soul growth.

Receptive people move more electrons or energy through the wire. This increased flow creates an electro-magnetic charge. This charge attracts further energy from the planets and the environment around them.

The more receptive you become as a sensitive person, the more energy you will attract to you.

Potential Abilities of Sensitive people

  • Clairsentience – perception of what is not normally perceptible
  • Empath – One who experiences the emotions of others
  • Premonition – anticipation of an event without conscious reason
  • Presentiment – a feeling that something will or is about to happen
  • Clairaudient – the power or faculty of hearing something not present to the ear but regarded as having objective reality

The above are Merriam Webster Dictionary definitions

The Challenges of Being an HSP/Empath/INFJ Sensitive

Loneliness – 20% of the population are sensitive and understand what you’re going through, but 80% have no idea. You know you’re different. You may have been called ‘too sensitive’ as a child, and perhaps you ‘shut down’ your sensitivity. (This is especially true for men in our society; which is such a shame. Hopefully, both men and women will find this site a safe place in which to open up.)

Depression – If you don’t know how to work with your gift, you may avoid others and you may miss out on life. Some sensitive persons become loners who may struggle with depression.

Self Awareness and Acceptance – It can be difficult to find answers for why you experience the world the way you do. As a result, it can be difficult to love and accept yourself and your beautiful gift.

Overwhelm – You feel ‘fried’, ‘frazzled’ and don’t know why. You’re a sponge for the energies of others and your environment. You may be taking in energies from adrenalized meat in your diet. You may also absorb residual energies. These can come from the people who process your food and manufacture the goods you use.

Easily Hurt – If an area on your body is sensitive and someone touches it, you feel it. If you’re a sensitive ‘soul’ with a sensitive heart, and someone ‘touches’ you with a mean word or look, you feel it more than others would. If you’re an empath, you may be picking up on energies not intended for you. As an INFJ or HSP you may be sensing anger and aggression through your intuitive abilities.

Anger – Biochemical processes can impact how you feel and act. Testosterone can fan the flames of an anger response. Anger can increase as a result of frustration. It’s difficult to live as a sensitive person in an insensitive world.

Anger can alienate you further from others. This can create a feedback loop of overwhelm and loneliness. Anger can be of special concern for sensitive men due to higher testosterone levels. For a society that values machismo, sensitive men are at a disadvantage.

Fatigue – Energy is used to process all the information coming in to your brain. At rest, the brain uses about 20% of the body’s energy. When you complete a complex task, the energy needs of your brain increase.

The brains of highly sensitive persons are wired differently than others. There is stronger activation in the regions used for awareness, empathy and ‘self-other’ processing according to this Brain and Behaviour research study.

Take Aways

  • You absorb more information than most
  • You are more aware and responsive to stimuli
  • You process information in a unique way. You extract nuance and create deeper meaning from the data
  • Your brain requires more energy than most. You need more vitamins and minerals; especially potassium and sodium. These help with the increased electrical charges in your brain.
  • You may sleep a lot to replenish

Good News! The challenges you face can be overcome with awareness and Life Hacks. Read to the end to grab the best Life Hack of all.

Understanding Your Super Power

From a Spiritual Perspective

What if …

  • You are spirit having a human experience.
  • You are at an advanced developmental stage in your soul’s journey.
  • You are able to connect with more as part of your evolutionary process.
  • You are learning to co-create with the Universe.
  • You are growing your ‘wings’, sort of speak.

You are learning to

  • Live a more consciously aware life.
  • Make better decisions.
  • Understand and Love the Self.
  • Foster Forgiveness and Compassion for your Journey.
  • Foster Forgiveness and Compassion for the Journey of Humanity.

From a Scientific Perspective

  • Your gift promotes survival of the species.
  • Your sensitivity gives you greater awareness.
  • You see the opportunities for food, mates, friends, and job prospects that others miss.
  • You have a greater responsiveness to both negative and positive stimuli. This can give you the edge when it comes to decisions; both large and small.

What Science is discovering is that the brain and body can become overwhelmed by sensory overload. As long as the benefits outweigh the costs, ‘sensitivity’ is a Super Power. It gives you an evolutionary advantage over others.

Potential Benefits of Your Super Power

  • Better relationships – quality, not quantity
  • Authenticity
  • Learn to work through problems – mediation
  • Purposeful life
  • Make the World a Better Place

Humans learn through story telling, movies, books, and art. These mediums give a ‘voice’ to the sensitive creatives in the world. Check out this Insight from the world of Comic Books on the Super Power of empathy.

If you’ve read this far, you’re likely a sensitive person. How do you share your beautiful insights?

Want to Fall in Love and Live Happily Ever After?

The most important intimate relationship you’ll ever have is the one you have with yourself. Understanding the Self is especially important for the highly sensitive person. Unfortunately, this can prove to be a problem. Sensory overload can rob you of your ability to connect with your inner being.

I’m going to share a Life Hack that will definitely help you in this regard.

According to wiktionary
A Life Hack is any process or technique that reduces chaos in one’s life and makes it easier to manage.

Life Hack #1 Meditation

The ability to go within so you can control the flow of energy is a skill you can learn through meditation. In 1991, I began a daily meditation practice. Initially, I couldn’t shut off Monkey Mind for more that a few seconds at a time. Patience and persistence paid off. Today, I can go within anytime to

  • Filter the energies coming at me and choose which ones to pay attention to
  • Focus on what’s important to me and my life
  • Flourish by creating the life that is best for me

You’ll be able to do the same if you begin a meditation practice and keep at it.

The more I understand me, the more I love me. The more I love me, the more I love others. It’s an epic love story and it’s one you can create in your life. Meditation paves the way.

Make Meditation Part of Your Daily Practice

Begin a short meditation practice today. Start by taking a deep breath in, holding for a second and exhaling slowly. Repeat for the next 4 breaths. Do this any time you feel stressed. Add this breathing meditation to your morning and evening wake and sleep rituals. Meditation doesn’t have to be complicated. Namaste (The spirit in me sees the spirit in you.)

P.S. This site doesn’t have any pop-ups, ads or constant requests to sign-up for more information. These disruptions add to sensory overload and affect sensitive people negatively.

Feel free to send me an email on the contact page if you would like to get in touch. Namaste

Going Forward

You might be a sensitive person in an insensitive world but you aren’t alone. It’s estimated there are over 1.5 billion people on planet Earth who have a similar experience to you. We’re still new at getting a handle on this thing, but….

Knowledge is power. Your differences can be your greatest strength. Understand what makes you different. Then learn to work with your evolutionary Super Powers so you thrive.

You can learn to
Filter, Focus and Flourish

Link here for a short history lesson of the quest for self knowledge.